Listening skills are the golden center of a therapist’s, friends, spouses, or significant others value to those that need an ear to fill. Not being a therapist it is sometimes more damaging to say what you think or know or think you know to the one who seems lost in a brightly lit, multi-signed world. We sometimes fail to conceive of another’s blindness and simply say “Open your eyes and stop this silliness”. While I have found that sharing information about how to change undesirable events from re-occurring is sometimes helpful, it is not always the case.
I have been the goto guy for people to expel their problems on for as long as I can remember. At times I have been Dr. Phil and alienated someone to the point that they never talked to me again. “I didn’t need your advice nor was I asking for it” I would hear sometimes,”I just needed to vent to someone because it was really bothering me but now I see how you think of me so I wont be bothering you anymore”. Most the time I felt bad about this but other times it was a much needed amputation of an infectious nature that antibiotics would only serve to make it grow.
So when you move on in life to relationships that become more than platonic it is usually best in these relationships to just “shut up and listen”. Your ideas and thoughts will most likely not be taken as empathetic, but rather a further attack or belittling of a problem that really disturbs the other person. This is a bad habit or broken thought process that haunts me to this very day. It starts fires where there is friction and dumps water on soaked souls. Now does this mean you should never? Of course not. There will always be those that want to here and you should always know just because you and experts say so, you should clarify that yours is just a screwdriver in the tool belt of life and yours is far from being full. Your just passing it along to someone else so they may see if it works for them. The more tools people have to work with, the more likely people can fix their own problems. Sometimes they just need to hold it in their hands for a bit before deciding to use it and rushing them or telling them how to do it can cause misuse and BLAM, Its all your fault.
So listen more and speak less. Sometimes “I see, wow or Uh huh” are all the more words a person needs to make them feel like you care.
Small Town, Big Feeling
Before I became a Blogger there was always so much to say without an outlet I felt suitable enough to express myself. It was funny how I received a notice on Facebook that a new comment had been made on a public post on our local newspapers Facebook page. It was a personal short story I shared about how when its neither needed nor expected, that there are still people in this world who do nice things for no reason whatsoever. I hope you enjoy it even though It may have a typo. Also if you have something to share, follow the link below and tell your story.
Why are liberals so angry all the time? Is it because they’re tired of paying taxes for people who are overweight, because they eat too much fast food, or people who smoke and get lung cancer, or people who drink and get liver disease? The rich don’t pay enough taxes? The top 25% pay almost 87 percent of all income tax collected. The top 5 percent pay nearly 58 percent of all income tax collected. 50 percent of Americans pay two to three percent in federal taxes the other 50 percent pay the remaining 97 to 98 percent of taxes. Yes liberals are mad because they pay to many taxes but think that we need to RAISE the taxes. Trickle down economics does work. It creates more opportunities for people to lift themselves out of poverty than any other government program ever devised. The role of government is to adjust the rates of lending to curb inflation/deflation and in times of recession (which is a natural occurring event due to lack of regular innovation) pump money into the economy to help spur innovation and prevent total economic collapse. You can not just give money to a select few and think it will work itself out. GM and Chrysler vacated to Mexico and Canada and union leaders made out like bandits. The industrial age is going out and the information age is coming in. In the future you will either work in the medical industry, technology, service industry or for the government or you will be unemployed. Unions are in their death throws and they can smell it coming like a freight train of dead skunks rolling past your doorstep. Generation X is coming of age and the world is going to be a better place because of it. I believe we were the last generation to carry the burdens of our parents and grandparents and the world has been handed to those after us and they don’t like the idea of having to put in work in order to have a better place. We can no longer afford to pass along the troubles of our elders to our children in hopes that they will be able to do better than us.